LIVE COMEDY SHOWS!

I’m coming to the DOYLESTOWN COMEDY CABARET Saturday night, January 17th, 9:00 PM. I LOVE THIS CLUB!!! This always sells out, so get your tix now by calling 215 345 JOKE!

TWO FUNNY PHILLY GUYS SHOW IS BACK!

Joe Conklin & I will be at the beautiful Colonial Theatre in Phoenixville on Saturday, February 7th, 8:00 PM (Celebrating the Eagles Super Bowl win!).

Then a return visit to the historic Broadway Theatre in Pitman NJ on Valentine's Day Night, Saturday February. 14th, at 8:00 PM.

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These shows have become legendary, so don't miss! Go to http://thecolonialtheatre.com or http://thebroadwaytheatre.org to get your tix! HURRY!

ORDER YOUR TWO FUNNY PHILLY GUYS DVD!
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TRIVIA APPEARANCES!

I'll be at PJ Whelihan's in Blue Bell for my fifth big year this Sunday for the Eagles - Giants game 1:00 PM.

QUIZZO!

I'll be at TOM & JERRY'S at 1006 McDade Blvd. in Milmont Park PA every Thursday for Quizzo at 8:00 PM! And... I'll have copies of THE GREAT BOOK OF PHILADELPHIA SPORTS LIST, the book about my Dad, LAST CALL, And the TWO FUNNY PHILLY GUYS DVD . . . with me.

THIS WEEK’S TRIVIA WINNER.... was Bobby Flick who correctly guessed Steve Buscemi as the actor who voiced a Christmas ad.

RAVINGS FROM A MAN THAT NEVER SLEEPS... 1/04

Nuts! Who expected all this from the Eagles? NOBODY did before Thanksgiving. Whelihan's today was the most fun I've had with the Eagles since the Birds and Garcia and crew beat the Giants in the post season two years ago. The place was just going nuts. Akers is back. FINALLY a big game out of Rocca. I've been telling you all year that I liked Avant. Samuel did was he was paid to do when he was signed. B-Dawk and Westbrook, well, they're superstars, aren't they? And Jackson might be one some day too. I know he's one hell of a rookie. See you next Sunday at 1:00 PM at Whelihan's in Blue Bell!

RAVINGS FROM A MAN THAT NEVER SLEEPS... 1/02

Whatever you do, do NOT see BENJAMIN BUTTON. It's the worst piece of crap EVER! If it wins an Oscar for Best Picture, I will leave this planet and my last note will say, "I can no longer live in a world that would reward something as awful as Benjamin Button. Tell my wife and kids I love them."

RAVINGS FROM A MAN THAT NEVER SLEEPS... 1/01

Geez, I know it only holds 100 people, but I gotta tell you I was surprised that we had to turn away almost that many for my show last night at Coffee.comedy in Sea Isle. When I took the gig, I'm thinking, are there enough people down there? Secret Service is at the OD and there's a lot of other joints doing their thing, so I was nervous. And it was freakin' windy and freezing! But turn out you did and it was one terrific show. Don't miss next year's! I always wanted to spend New Years at the shore because all the knuckleheads on my street come down, but I'm always working, so I never make it down. Wow, the town was really decked out and hopping. Turned out to be one of my favorite New year's in recent years. THANKS!

RAVINGS FROM A MAN THAT NEVER SLEEPS... 12/31

Is Rob Ellis terrific or what? He's been a blast to work with. A host who really knows his sports inside and out with enough of a sense of humor to work with a knuckle head like me...

Saw THE READER with Kate Winslett. It's slow, sad, strange, so I guess I can't recommend it to everybody, but I really moved by it. Ralph Fiennes is good also...

I have completely lost interest in the Sixers.  Isn't that horrible? With Brand back, I guess they can turn it around (maybe), but in the meantime...

I must be the only one in the world who watched THE SHIELD from season one to the very end, having MISSED the ENTIRE season six. Isn't that weird? So I watched episode one of 6 and it was phenomenal, and I was wondering how I would react watching a season where I already know all the ultimate endings. What a show!

I love people who say "If I don't see you have a happy new year." Well, what happens if they do see me on new year's? They gonna punch me in the face?

RAVINGS FROM A MAN THAT NEVER SLEEPS... 12/29

I've been in this town my whole life and the NFL events that occurred yesterday was just beyond belief. I'm stunned, speechless, what an amazing day. One of the greatest days in this town's history when you consider everything that had to happen...

Digging on this very strange CD called VAMPIRE WEEKEND. Check it out before you buy it, it's weird, but so far, I dig it... Thanks, Spins!

Huh?  Sugar Free Red Bull jacks me up way more that the regular type WITH sugar. Go figure. It tastes like crap, but boy, it gets me going....

Someone should simply stop McNabb from getting in front of a microphone...

MILK is pretty boring. Sean Penn is great and all that, but it just doesn't MOVE...

Merrill Reece has never been better...

Did you ever notice how many movies, set in CURRENT times, use answering machines. who has an answering machine anymore? 

Need someone who does carpet tightening (for real) and someone to get my boxers out of the crack of my ass!

Saw Brian Hickey today at McGee Rehab. Talked, joked with him. He's got a long road back, but he can do it. Funny people last longer, they really do. Would love to catch the scumbag who ran him over and left him for dead.

HAPPY BLUE YEAR!

RAVINGS FROM A MAN THAT NEVER SLEEPS... 12/28

Some deaths that affected me in 2008. Before I list them, take note I could not find a site that listed local folk who died this year, and as I write this I have a tremendous hangover, which I rarely get, so I might overlook some people, so that's where you come in by writing me. These deaths are in no order whatsoever.

George Carlin... Mitch Mitchell... Paul Newman... Dick Martin... Robert Prosky... Bob "Bulge" Mitchell... Sydney Pollack   Norman Whitfield... Levi Stubbs... Roy Scheider... Isaac Hayes... Jo Stafford... Jerry Wexler... Danny Federici...
Richard Widmark... Suzanne Pheshette

RAVINGS FROM A MAN THAT NEVER SLEEPS... 12/27

MICHAEL CLANCY is one hell of a film. Something about it, I can watch it over and over again...

Vice President Bill Matz is one funny guy. hope you're enjoying his work as one of my interns

The Xmas day Lakers-Celtics game was a classic, wasn't it?

Don't get RECOVERY by Loudon Wainwright III, it blows. Just go out and get his first 3 CD's if you can find them...

Someone please take Comcast's power over the Sixers away from them. They are ruining one of the great franchises in NBA history...

GRAN TORINO is not great, but it's very good, and worth the price of admission...

Staying in bed today. The whole freakin' day!

RAVINGS FROM A MAN THAT NEVER SLEEPS... 12/16

Mo had to go, but Tony DiLeo? Plus, if I'm hearing that it wasn't Mo's idea to use AI at the 2-spot to begin with, then damn, that's not fair...

CADILLAC RECORDS doesn't work, but ROLE MODELS has a bunch of laughs...

Randy Newman's, and particularly Neil Young's and Kanye West's new ones are excellent! Plus my brother found a live Captain Beefheart CD that's a real trip...

When I stop and pay my $4 bridge toll, I say "here's a buck for you, so you don't lose your job, here's a dollar for the new soccer stadium, a buck for the Philadelphia Orchestra, AND STICK THE LAST DOLLAR UP YOUR BOSS'S ASS!" What a disgrace...

If it wasn't for THE OFFICE, I wouldn't be TIVOing any fiction show at all...

Anyone have any of the first two Roxy Music covers?

The Birds just might do it. DeSean Jackson is a star!

SO happy Jamie Moyer's back...

The 24 Rock song list was so popular (click here for the list), I decided to see if I couldn't do the same for movies. One for every week. I'm going to go through my own collection and start in alphabetical order. All movies must be at least 5 years old to pass my standard passage of time. Please send your suggestions. REMEMBER, none of the flicks below are definites yet, just under consideration.
The list has gotten so big... click here for A through N

O

• ON THE WATERFRONT... When the proverbial gun is put to my crotch, and I'm asked what is the greatest drama ever made, THIS one is always mentioned immediately. THIS is Brando's finest performance, not STREETCAR. Steiger, Cobb, Marie-Saint, Malden, brilliant B&W, and what a score (his only!) from Leonard Bernstein. I COULD HAVE BEEN A CONTENDER!
• ONCE UPON A TIME IN THE WEST... Bizarre operatic western that's almost impossible to watch from beginning to end, but it's great moments are untouchable. Henry Fonda (as a role reversal bad guy), Charles Bronson and the ridiculously gorgeous Claudia Cardinale. A must see
• ONE FLEW OVER THE CUCKOO'S NEST... Geez, what to say about this one? I read the book AND saw the play before I saw the movie and BOTH of them are WAY superior. The movie plays it for belly laughs whenever it can, and the book and play barely had a laugh in it. Having said all that, it's still a deep and complex and, yes, funny flick. Yes, Jack's great, but the Chief and all the side characters such as Billy Bibbitt and Martini steal the show for me. One other problem with CUCKOO. I had someone very close to me spend YEARS in a facility like this, and because of that, I really don't think I'll ever be able to watch this movie ever again.
• ONE FROM THE HEART... Do you know this flick routinely appears on "WORST movie of all time" lists? Directed by Coppola, it bankrupted his studio and many would say he was never the same director again. (Although, I dig THE OUTSIDERS & RUMBLE FISH which he made right after HEART) It's the story of two bored lovers living in Vegas set to the music of Tom Waits, so you know I'm a sucker for the film right there since Waits is one of my all-time musical idols. It's a love story and my wife and I saw it up NY right before we got married, so I guess it's got that going for it too. A few years ago, it got re- released as a "lost classic" on DVD and someone from the Prince Theatre in downtown Philly heard me mention on my radio show hat I had many vintage posters and stills from the film. Well, they were showing the film on the big screen and asked me to lend them my stuff to put in the lobby, which I did. When I showed up they had off it displayed in the lobby and all of it had these little stickers on it that said "FROM THE COLLECTION OF BIG DADDY GRAHAM." which made it appear like I was some major art collector or Dennis Hopper or something. Really got a hoot out of that!
• ORDINARY PEOPLE... It really steams me when you hear the biggest crime in Oscar history was when ORDINARY "stole" the Best Picture Oscar from RAGING BULL. Look, I love BULL as much as the next guy and it's absolutely gonna make the 52, but to tell you the truth, ORDINARY IS the better picture.  BULL may have more classic scenes and that amazing DeNiro performance, but it rambles on at the end. PEOPLE is the one psychiatry film that works for me because that kid absolutely has a great reason to be in the headjam he's in.  A dead brother, and the all time Mother from Hell, played to perfection by Mary Tyler Moore. In fact, when I salute the All Time Movie Villains, she's right up there with Hannibal Lecter. And who wouldn't want a father like Donald Sutherland in this film? Of course, Timothy Hutton, who holds the whole film together with his stunning portrayal as the troubled suicidal kid, also deservingly won the Oscar. Not a bad note in the entire perfect film.

P

• PLATOON... Not nuts about the ending, but the rest of it is as good as a war movie gets. I love when Keith David is talking to Charlie Sheen, who's cleaning latrines and says to him, "what's a nice white boy like you doing here anyway?" Sheen replies that he wanted to do his part, that he didn't think it was right that wars were always fought by the poor. David turns to him and says, "Damn, You gotta be rich to even THINK like that!" PLATOON is still probably the only 'Nam movie directed by a guy (Oliver Stone, which is who Sheen is basically playing) who actually served there. Yeah, that's Johnny drama playing the severely disturbed soldier.
• PLAY IT AGAIN, SAM... Directed by Herbert Ross, which makes it the only Woody Allen movie ever NOT directed by Allen. And it shows. And it's based it San Fran, which also makes it unique for an Allen movie. "You can reach me at Frozen Tundra 7-4756."
• PRIZZI'S HONOR... One of my fav Nicholson performances as the dumber than dirt (or is that "dumb as a fox?") mobster. Great supporting cast led by Anjelica Huston (directed by her father, John, who was in a wheelchair and hooked up to an oxygen tank) and the hilarious William Hickey.
• PSYCHO... Has the horrible tacked on ending with the psychiatrist explaining to us what we just saw (like we're a bunch of idiots who didn't understand it on our own), but the rest of it is just brilliant. My older sister took me to this on a Saturday evening at the Benn Theatre (PSYCHO is the FIRST movie I ever saw at night), then ditched me when she got in the theatre to hang with her boyfriend. So you can imagine how scared shitless I was! Holds up great today and that opening scene with Janet Leigh, HELLO!
• PULP FICTION... Won't make the 52 because Tarantino ruins the film every second he's on the screen. And those endless scenes between Willis and his ridiculous girlfriend don't help matters much either, but the rest of it? Just too much fun and how Samuel L. didn't win an Oscar for this is beyond me.

Q

• THE QUIET MAN... Corny as hell, but impossible not to love. Top three Wayne performances and Maureen's not too bad on the eyes, is she? Next time you watch it, check this out. Wayne puffs two times on every cigarette in the movie, then flicks it away.

R

• RADIO DAYS... Little known Woody Allen film that is a real gem. It's a salute to an era when families huddled around the radio for entertainment. It's also a story that revolves around a time period when families were forced to live together longer due to financial restraints, which this country may be moving towards again.  Not a bad note in the film. It's perfect. That's Seth Green playing a young Woody.
• RAGING BULL... Amazing how awesome this film is when you consider there's not a nice person in it. When pressed, I'll say that DeNiro in this movie gives the greatest performance by any actor EVER. Fans chat about the weight DeNiro put on and ignore the terrific shape he put himself in as a boxer. "Don't overcook it. It defeats it's own purpose."
• RESERVOIR DOGS... Tarantino's most perfect movie. Would make a great play considering most of it takes place in one room. Amazing cast, and as always, great choice of oldies. By the way, never got the title. WHY AM I MR. PINK?!
• ROAD WARRIOR... Brilliant stunts, Gibson at his best, and damn, if it doesn't look like the world is heading that way. And I love that kid with the boomerang. I AM THE AYATOLLAH OF ROCK AND ROLLAH!
• ROCKY...  Imagine how BETTER of a classic this would be if the fight scenes has been more realistic. Leaving that out of it, it's a beautiful, beautiful film. Seeing our streets the way they're supposed to be seen. The pre-steroid Stallone is just perfect as the lovable, lonely lug. And of course Bill Conti's score is only one of the Top Ten soundtracks EVER and it infuriates me when other cities use it at sporting events to pump the crowd up. IT'S OUR SONG!
• RUTHLESS PEOPLE... Another gem from the Abrahams, Zucker & Zucker team that brought you AIRPLANE and the NAKED GUN series. Features Danny DeVito at his best, a smoking Anita Morris (Stones fans might remember her from the SHE WAS HOT video) and a young, bleach blonded, hilarious Bill Pullman.

S

• SCARFACE... Yeah, it's too long, it's ridiculously violent, it's become way too trendy, but Pacino's performance is memorizing from beginning to end. And the supporting cast never gets enough credit. Loggia, Pfeiffer, Abraham, Harris Yulin, Bauer, all great. WHO SAYS YOU WAS A COP, MEL.
• SCHINDLER'S LIST... An amazing film that unfortunately for its subject matter is difficult to watch on any repeated basis. And it took nerve to put on the ending with all the real people. That could have easily NOT worked. Although, he's always working, I often wondered is Ralph Fiennes didn't regret taking the role of a Nazi monster because he never became the big star that he was predicted to be. Who can forget the girl in the red coat?
• SE7EN... With the possible exception of BLUE VELVET, is there a darker film on this list? Why then, do I find it so irresistible to watch? Is there something wrong with me? Freeman & Pitt are perfect together, and Spacey? Terrific. The single most shocking ending EVER.
• SEXY BEAST... Ben Kingsley's best performance and that's saying a lot! He plays a mobster who won't allow his ex-con buddy to start a new crime free life, played expertly by Ray Winstone. Look for Ian McShane from DEADWOOD, he's even darker in this! The cockney accents are so severe, you MUST watch this with subtitles.
• SHANE... Not big on Westerns, but Alan Ladd and Jack Palance are extraordinary and the cinematography is breathtaking.  COME BACK, SHANE!
• SID & NANCY... Gary Oldham's finest performance and that's saying a lot. Somehow, through all the depravity and sordidness and drugs, it's a great love story, despite the fact that Webb's performance of Nancy is so annoying you wanna shoot her right up on the screen. As in with a gun, not skag. I thought the Sex Pistol's were awesome and I loved that whole time period. Used to go up NY and hand around the Mudd Club and all that, thinking I was a punk rocker. Silly, eh? But the music was sure great! BORING, SIDNEY, BORING!
• SILENCE OF THE LAMBS... I was opening up for Manhattan Transfer at Resorts and my wife and I decided to go see the 430 show in Pleasantville which would give me enough time to be backstage by 730. BIG MISTAKE. The movie shook me down to my socks and I really had to shake it off before I went on. Hopkins is only on the screen for 25 minutes and it feels like two hours. (By the way, that's the shortest screen time ever for a Best Actor Oscar) Not a Foster fan, buy she's dynamite in this. So's Ted Levine as Bill. Howard Shore's score really makes the movie happen. I don't like it how they turn Hannibal into a superman at the end of the flick and I hated that they ended the movie on a dumb joke, but this one's a horrifying winner.
• SINGING IN THE RAIN... All the corniness works because it was written that way intentionally. Incredible color and of course one of the great dance scenes ever. One great song after another and amazing color.
• SIXTH SENSE... No, I didn't see the ending coming and it's still a terrific film to watch even AFTER you know it. Fun seeing all the Philly street scenes. Absolutely bone-chilling scary in some parts. The scene where the always great Toni Collette breaks down and cries in the car destroys me. Only the moment at the funeral where the kid was poisoned doesn't work for me. People love to point out that all of Night's other films suck, but if he had only ever made this one film, it be a wonderful accomplishment.
• SOME LIKE IT HOT...   Marilyn at HER hottest and Lemmon & Curtis are terrific together. Screwball, romantic comedies don't get better than this and one of the best last lines ever delivered by the wonderful Joe E. Brown.
• THE STING... So much fun to watch heavyweights like Newman, Shaw, Durning and Redford going at it, eh? I'm an Edward Hopper fan, so you can imagine how much I love these sets. Had never heard the song SOLACE before this movie and it's now one of my all time instrumentals.

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